This is for you. You know who you are. I have been down that path before and I know what it feels. This is what I scribbled then and juvenile as it may sound, it did manage to pull me up. I'm hoping it does for you a fraction of what it did for me i.e lift you up to where the eagles soar.
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A Resolve
Today I will let depression weigh me down
as I search for an answer to my self inflicted problems
Today I will be awash with sadness
as I delve deep down into my core searching for that stubborn root
Today I will let the past fall on me like a shroud
as I fumble in the darkness tracing the patterns life has weaved
Today I will look back on past loves and betrayals
as I count the many times I've been wronged
Today I see my first love swearing undying love and loyalty to me
only to break my heart ten times and over
Today I see my second love so ardent and so earnest
only to say it was a mistake
Poetry and physics dont get along, they say
Today I see my third love, the obsessive one
my stalker, sweet talker; this had to break
Today I see my fourth love, the love after a sabbatical
the one that succeeded in ripping my heart
whose promises were glorified lies, the deserter, who walked away when the world called out 'fight'
Today I will reflect on these loves who have lost the best they could have had
as I smile to myself, I'm notches above
Today I will rue opportunities gone by
as I figure out a way to rid me of complacency
Today I will let morbid thoughts in
as I fight for a way to bring in a better day
Today I will let death play on my mind
as I devise a plan to love life
Today I discard, reject, accept
as I chart out a path to success
Today I will let hurt, anger and pain into my heart
as it constricts and threatens to pop my veins
The storm before the calm
Today I will skim through my friends, everyone of them
as I strike them all off my list one by one, I dont need excess baggage
that weighs me down instead of being my asset
Today I will remember promises that have been made
as I mercilessly rip them to shreds,
It's true, promises were meant to be broken
The truth lies in the unspoken
Today I will mull on the heavy burden of being looked up to
as I try desperately to stay afloat
and tonight,
I will forgive those that wronged me including myself
but I'll never forget
Because forgiving is moving on
and remembering is what makes me stronger
Tonight, I will toss all burdens aside
unworthy people, things and desires
Tonight, I resolve to cast away all hurt
and bring in pride, that will help me survive
Tonight as I watch the moon burn bright,
I smile in anticipation of the day
when chest out, chin determined, sans heart, I'm born again.
~~me
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Resolve
Today I will let depression weigh me down
as I search for an answer to my self inflicted problems
Today I will be awash with sadness
as I delve deep down into my core searching for that stubborn root
Today I will let the past fall on me like a shroud
as I fumble in the darkness tracing the patterns life has weaved
Today I will look back on past loves and betrayals
as I count the many times I've been wronged
Today I see my first love swearing undying love and loyalty to me
only to break my heart ten times and over
Today I see my second love so ardent and so earnest
only to say it was a mistake
Poetry and physics dont get along, they say
Today I see my third love, the obsessive one
my stalker, sweet talker; this had to break
Today I see my fourth love, the love after a sabbatical
the one that succeeded in ripping my heart
whose promises were glorified lies, the deserter, who walked away when the world called out 'fight'
Today I will reflect on these loves who have lost the best they could have had
as I smile to myself, I'm notches above
Today I will rue opportunities gone by
as I figure out a way to rid me of complacency
Today I will let morbid thoughts in
as I fight for a way to bring in a better day
Today I will let death play on my mind
as I devise a plan to love life
Today I discard, reject, accept
as I chart out a path to success
Today I will let hurt, anger and pain into my heart
as it constricts and threatens to pop my veins
The storm before the calm
Today I will skim through my friends, everyone of them
as I strike them all off my list one by one, I dont need excess baggage
that weighs me down instead of being my asset
Today I will remember promises that have been made
as I mercilessly rip them to shreds,
It's true, promises were meant to be broken
The truth lies in the unspoken
Today I will mull on the heavy burden of being looked up to
as I try desperately to stay afloat
and tonight,
I will forgive those that wronged me including myself
but I'll never forget
Because forgiving is moving on
and remembering is what makes me stronger
Tonight, I will toss all burdens aside
unworthy people, things and desires
Tonight, I resolve to cast away all hurt
and bring in pride, that will help me survive
Tonight as I watch the moon burn bright,
I smile in anticipation of the day
when chest out, chin determined, sans heart, I'm born again.
~~me
